Tales of the Bus: FAQ Edition

Are you a first time bus rider?  A long-time bus rider, who is maybe confused by some of the rules and etiquette of the bus?  Well congratulations, you've come to the right place! I'm here to clear up any confusion there might be out there about what is considered acceptable behavior on the bus.

I bring a bag with me to work every day, plus my lunch.  Can I put these items on the seat beside me so that I have more room?
No.  Did you pay for that seat for your bags?  If not, the answer is no.  Put them on your lap just like everyone else.   

A visibly pregnant lady/lady with a kid/elderly person gets on the bus, do I have to give up my seat?
YES.  Every time.  You should jump out of your seat so fast you risk injury.

But, but...I have a great seat!  And I've had a long day at the office.  I'm tired.
I don't care.  GET UP NOW.

What if, instead of getting up, I just pretend to be engrossed in my book and avoid eye contact?
I can't even believe we're still having this conversation-next question, please! 

How should I proceed when getting on/off the bus with my fare or bus pass?
You should have everything ready, in hand, every single day.  It's not rocket science; every single day, you pay to ride the bus.  Have it ready to go, there is nothing worse than being stuck behind someone who is fumbling in their pockets to come up with the fare, or dig up their ID. 

I like to listen to music during my bus ride, is it ok to bring my iPod on with me?
Of course!  Enjoy your music!

Great!  I have the best taste in music, is it ok to turn my iPod up so loudly that everyone within a 10 foot radius can enjoy my playlist at 7am?
This is not ok.  While we're on this subject, it's also never ok to sing along with your music, regardless of the decibel level.

If I get on the bus and it's already crowded, should I hover right near the front so that everyone else who gets on after me has to squeeze by me in order to move to the back of the bus? 
This is a situation where you should use this crazy thing called "common sense" and move to the back of the bus, just like everyone else.  


Ok, fine...I moved to the back of the bus.  I also carry a backpack that I keep stuffed with what appears to be an entire set of encyclopedias so it really stands off far from my back, should I keep it on my back, then spin around a bunch every time someone has to get off of the bus, inevitably hitting someone in the head?
Again, embrace the trend of common sense.  Put the backpack on the floor in front of you, or hold it.  No one wants to get a concussion on the bus from your backpack.


My boyfriend and I are going through a rough patch, is it ok to call him while I'm on the bus and have a heated argument about whether or not it's acceptable for him to come home at 3am from the clubs, smelling like another woman's perfume?
Yes, everyone wants to hear your saga.  They also love it when you use words I've never even heard of to describe the woman from the club.  It's super educational to be a passenger during those times, so thanks for that.