Are you a first time bus rider? A long-time bus rider, who is maybe confused by some of the rules and etiquette of the bus? Well congratulations, you've come to the right place! I'm here to clear up any confusion there might be out there about what is considered acceptable behavior on the bus.
I bring a bag with me to work every day, plus my lunch. Can I put these items on the seat beside me so that I have more room?
No. Did you pay for that seat for your bags? If not, the answer is no. Put them on your lap just like everyone else.
A visibly pregnant lady/lady with a kid/elderly person gets on the bus, do I have to give up my seat?
YES. Every time. You should jump out of your seat so fast you risk injury.
But, but...I have a great seat! And I've had a long day at the office. I'm tired.
I don't care. GET UP NOW.
What if, instead of getting up, I just pretend to be engrossed in my book and avoid eye contact?
I can't even believe we're still having this conversation-next question, please!
How should I proceed when getting on/off the bus with my fare or bus pass?
You should have everything ready, in hand, every single day. It's not rocket science; every single day, you pay to ride the bus. Have it ready to go, there is nothing worse than being stuck behind someone who is fumbling in their pockets to come up with the fare, or dig up their ID.
I like to listen to music during my bus ride, is it ok to bring my iPod on with me?
Of course! Enjoy your music!
Great! I have the best taste in music, is it ok to turn my iPod up so loudly that everyone within a 10 foot radius can enjoy my playlist at 7am?
This is not ok. While we're on this subject, it's also never ok to sing along with your music, regardless of the decibel level.
If I get on the bus and it's already crowded, should I hover right near the front so that everyone else who gets on after me has to squeeze by me in order to move to the back of the bus?
This is a situation where you should use this crazy thing called "common sense" and move to the back of the bus, just like everyone else.
Ok, fine...I moved to the back of the bus. I also carry a backpack that I keep stuffed with what appears to be an entire set of encyclopedias so it really stands off far from my back, should I keep it on my back, then spin around a bunch every time someone has to get off of the bus, inevitably hitting someone in the head?
Again, embrace the trend of common sense. Put the backpack on the floor in front of you, or hold it. No one wants to get a concussion on the bus from your backpack.
My boyfriend and I are going through a rough patch, is it ok to call him while I'm on the bus and have a heated argument about whether or not it's acceptable for him to come home at 3am from the clubs, smelling like another woman's perfume?
Yes, everyone wants to hear your saga. They also love it when you use words I've never even heard of to describe the woman from the club. It's super educational to be a passenger during those times, so thanks for that.
Showing posts with label Tales of the Bus. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tales of the Bus. Show all posts
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Tales of the Bus: I just can't help myself.
I'm standing near the exit of the door, waiting to get off the bus downtown, but we end up getting stuck at a red light. So I'm standing there, and I feel something on my back. I ignore it. I feel it again, and move a little bit, assuming I'm just brushing up against someone's bag strap or something (the bus is packed, so turning around to look wouldn't have been easy) But then I feel it a third time, and turn around because by now, I'm having visions of a rat or something creeping up my back and I really just want to rule out that possibility.
Fortunately, I do not find myself staring into the eyes of a rat, but rather, the eyes of a woman who says to me, "Sorry, I just can't help myself". I must have just looked at her with bewilderment/confusion/terror because she quickly said, "Oh, you had some hairs on your back, I can't seem to stop myself when I see that on people, I always pull them off for them!" She said it in a way that almost seemed like she expected me to say thank you, and being in a state of confusion, I think I might have thanked her before running off the bus.
Fortunately, I do not find myself staring into the eyes of a rat, but rather, the eyes of a woman who says to me, "Sorry, I just can't help myself". I must have just looked at her with bewilderment/confusion/terror because she quickly said, "Oh, you had some hairs on your back, I can't seem to stop myself when I see that on people, I always pull them off for them!" She said it in a way that almost seemed like she expected me to say thank you, and being in a state of confusion, I think I might have thanked her before running off the bus.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Tales of the Bus: thanks to your mama
My bus stop was approaching, so I moved toward the front and swiped my ID. We got stuck at a light, so I was standing near the bus driver and he turned toward me and said, "The next time you talk to your mom, tell her I said thank you". I could have sworn that's what he said, but thought perhaps it was just too early in the morning for my ears to be properly functioning, so I said "I'm sorry, I didn't hear you?", to which he replied, "Please tell your mom I said thanks...I'm assuming that's where you got your beautiful blue eyes from".
So if there are any single guys reading this blog (for some weird reason), there you have it...I just spoon fed you your next great pick up line, courtesy of my bus driver. You're welcome.
So if there are any single guys reading this blog (for some weird reason), there you have it...I just spoon fed you your next great pick up line, courtesy of my bus driver. You're welcome.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
On the Tubes
Tales of the Bus Wednesday!
It's a typical day on the bus from downtown to Oakland in the morning, we're slowly making our way up 5th Avenue when all of a sudden, we get to a stoplight that is totally backed up. 3 buses in front of us, with some cars in between...the light ahead is turning green, but no one is going. So the driver gets out to see what's going on, comes back a minute later and reports that it's going to be a bit of a wait, as someone had a seizure in the middle of the street and they were waiting on the paramedics to arrive.
People on the bus seemed to have 1 of 3 reactions:
Reaction #1 (aka-what I consider to be the normal reaction): Oh, I hope that man is ok. Guess I'll just be a few minutes late to work, not much else I can do.
Reaction #2 (aka-what I consider to be the selfish person reaction, who clearly thinks the world revolves around them and only them): Oh my God, are you kidding me? This is ridiculous. I'm going to be late! What a waste of my time. Unbelievable. Do you think we should just get off the bus and see if we can catch another one? (side note-some people actually did this...where they thought they were going to go, short of WALKING into Oakland, I'm not sure. Needless to say, they were back on the bus within a minute, once they realized traffic was backed up for blocks and there was nowhere to go)
Reaction #3 (aka-the most absurd reaction by far, and of course, it happens to come from the guy sitting directly across from me, who was practically yelling these words during his 5 minute rant until the driver returned to the bus): You gotta be kidding me. Yinz know the only reason he's doin' that is so he can go up to Mercy Hospital and be hooked up to the tubes to get the drugs, right? I guarantee you that's what this is about. He just wants the drugs, that's what it's always about. I bet it was one of them guys from that Occupy Movement. Yeah, he's trying to get himself on the tubes, that's all.
Remember dear readers, it's always about getting yourself "on the tubes".
It's a typical day on the bus from downtown to Oakland in the morning, we're slowly making our way up 5th Avenue when all of a sudden, we get to a stoplight that is totally backed up. 3 buses in front of us, with some cars in between...the light ahead is turning green, but no one is going. So the driver gets out to see what's going on, comes back a minute later and reports that it's going to be a bit of a wait, as someone had a seizure in the middle of the street and they were waiting on the paramedics to arrive.
People on the bus seemed to have 1 of 3 reactions:
Reaction #1 (aka-what I consider to be the normal reaction): Oh, I hope that man is ok. Guess I'll just be a few minutes late to work, not much else I can do.
Reaction #2 (aka-what I consider to be the selfish person reaction, who clearly thinks the world revolves around them and only them): Oh my God, are you kidding me? This is ridiculous. I'm going to be late! What a waste of my time. Unbelievable. Do you think we should just get off the bus and see if we can catch another one? (side note-some people actually did this...where they thought they were going to go, short of WALKING into Oakland, I'm not sure. Needless to say, they were back on the bus within a minute, once they realized traffic was backed up for blocks and there was nowhere to go)
Reaction #3 (aka-the most absurd reaction by far, and of course, it happens to come from the guy sitting directly across from me, who was practically yelling these words during his 5 minute rant until the driver returned to the bus): You gotta be kidding me. Yinz know the only reason he's doin' that is so he can go up to Mercy Hospital and be hooked up to the tubes to get the drugs, right? I guarantee you that's what this is about. He just wants the drugs, that's what it's always about. I bet it was one of them guys from that Occupy Movement. Yeah, he's trying to get himself on the tubes, that's all.
Remember dear readers, it's always about getting yourself "on the tubes".
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Oh, rats.
Time for Tales of the Bus Wednesday!
Overheard on the CB radio:
Um, yeah, hey...so I got a rat in the back of my bus here. What do you want me to do about it?
I bet even the rat had the decency to only take up one seat on that bus, and keep all of his little rat belongings on his lap.
Or, maybe he was just a refugee from Occupy Pittsburgh.
Overheard on the CB radio:
Um, yeah, hey...so I got a rat in the back of my bus here. What do you want me to do about it?
I bet even the rat had the decency to only take up one seat on that bus, and keep all of his little rat belongings on his lap.
Or, maybe he was just a refugee from Occupy Pittsburgh.
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
I said I should write a book about it...
...but I think I'll just blog about it instead. My book idea would have been based on my adventures riding the bus. I have been using public transportation to and from work, nearly every day, for the past 8.5 years. I prefer it this way: the main reason being the cost-effectiveness of using the bus (especially since I don't have to pay to ride, thanks to my Pitt ID), I don't have to deal with the headache of sitting in traffic, and it gives me some down time to read or just unwind from the day.
Even though it's my preferred method of transportation, it is certainly not without faults. Late buses, crowded buses, having to stand at a bus stop in all kinds of not nice weather...but most of all, the faults tend to be due fellow passengers.
With that being said, I will be dedicating Wednesdays to tales of public transportation. Some of these stories might be older, I've built up quite the collection of horror stories in the past 8.5 years, but they will make you scratch your head and wonder what is wrong with the world today, so they are still relevant. Today's story is one that (sadly) occurs on a regular basis, including this morning.
Dear Fellow Passenger,
Your insistence on putting your work bag on the seat beside you is maddening and just flat out rude. You are no more entitled to a seat on this bus than I am. And your bag? Not entitled to a seat at ALL. As if it's not bad enough that you plop your bag down there every.freaking.day (when this bus is jam packed, standing room only every.freaking.day), the fact that you roll your eyes and sigh like I've asked you for a kidney when I politely ask you if I can sit there makes me want to slap you across the face and ask if you were raised in a barn. Instead, I take the passive-aggressive route and give an exaggerated, "WOW, thank you soooooo much!" as I sit down. With my bag IN my lap...because that's how it's done.
Even though it's my preferred method of transportation, it is certainly not without faults. Late buses, crowded buses, having to stand at a bus stop in all kinds of not nice weather...but most of all, the faults tend to be due fellow passengers.
With that being said, I will be dedicating Wednesdays to tales of public transportation. Some of these stories might be older, I've built up quite the collection of horror stories in the past 8.5 years, but they will make you scratch your head and wonder what is wrong with the world today, so they are still relevant. Today's story is one that (sadly) occurs on a regular basis, including this morning.
Dear Fellow Passenger,
Your insistence on putting your work bag on the seat beside you is maddening and just flat out rude. You are no more entitled to a seat on this bus than I am. And your bag? Not entitled to a seat at ALL. As if it's not bad enough that you plop your bag down there every.freaking.day (when this bus is jam packed, standing room only every.freaking.day), the fact that you roll your eyes and sigh like I've asked you for a kidney when I politely ask you if I can sit there makes me want to slap you across the face and ask if you were raised in a barn. Instead, I take the passive-aggressive route and give an exaggerated, "WOW, thank you soooooo much!" as I sit down. With my bag IN my lap...because that's how it's done.
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