Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Oh the shame!!!

I have a confession: I started giving Liam a binky. He loves it. So why do I feel like such a mommy failure??

Jake never took a binky, despite my best efforts to make him love it; with him, I was the human pacifier. I was desperate for a break & tried all different kinds of binkies with him, but he rejected them all. So, I accepted my fate as being his item of comfort and moved on. So if I was so willing to give one to him, why do I feel guilty that I'm giving one to Liam, who is more than willing to accept it?

I think there are a few reasons...the social stigma (you know, the Look you get from other moms who DON'T do things the same way you do), the fear of breaking the habit later on, my personal fear of him wanting it at night (so far I've only been giving it to him during the day) and then starting a cycle of retrieving it at 3am when it falls out of his mouth and, maybe the biggest reason, feeling bad that he needs a binky to be soothed, instead of me. Not that I want to be used as a human pacifier again, but more that sometimes, there are just no other ways to comfort him, regardless of how much bouncing, singing or swaying I might try.

I know they're all pretty silly reasons and that no one will be permanently damaged from him using the binky....so I guess I'll just give it to him when he needs it & appreciate the content state of being that it brings:


Team Clancy said...

There is NO shame! When a screaming baby stops screaming because you gave him a binky - it means you are a success because you found something to soothe him!!!!!!!! God bless the binky!!!!!

Please excuse me while I go shove one in my son's mouth now :-)

Michelle said...

Girl, get rid of that shame at once! It does not mean he doesn't need you to soothe him, it just means he has a high need to suck. Henry got really good and fast at retrieving his binky after a couple of months! Amelia was like Jake and didn't take one, now I have them sprinkled everywhere. DO WHAT WORKS!

Life with Pog & FLeC said...

Ditch the guilt! Both my kids took pacis. M gave hers up on her own about 8 1/2 months. We took C's away when he turned 1. Both were totally fine. Both loved their pacis when they were really little, but we very quickly weaned them to nap- or bed-time only. It was fine. Liam obviously just has the need to suck. Let him!

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